If you are like me, probably you started 2020 as excited as you could be about the new year. For myself and a lot of people I know, 2020 was supposed to be one of the best years so far. We were on a roll, riding the wave of life, we were enjoying the freedom of travelling, expensive holidays, seeing our loved ones, huge parties…And we kind of took it all for granted, right?
I don’t think any of us could have seen last year coming. We were so used to working fast, doing things as fast as possible, almost never stopping to reflect on our lives, that we the first lockdown came, it was almost like a shock. We weren’t used to have so much free time for ourselves all of a sudden!
For myself personally, 2020 was full of ups and downs and I learned more about myself than I did in the last 7 years. 2020 was supposed to be the year I was finally getting married after waiting for 2 years for a specific date: 10.10.2020. I hoped and hoped that the event will take place, but finally we decided that we will wait for things to get better before we have the wedding. It was a year full of personal challenges, realisations that maybe some people are not that close to me anymore and I should let go of them. It was a year when I realised that I need to reach out for help, I need to feel close to people and have a connection with them and it was the year of realisation that I have so much to share that it’s a shame to stay hidden behind my fears and insecurities.
2020 for me was the year I finally had to accept that being a yoga teacher is part of my identity and I don’t need to choose to be one or the other. But what I do need to be is focused, decided and willing to take action, no matter how scared I am to put myself out there.
What I learned about myself last year is that I have a lot of trouble with releasing the need to control my life. I had always been the planner, the achiever, the do-er. I always had things under control and whatever I wanted, I achieved it, according to my timelines: my job, travelling to Bali, getting a house, doing a yoga teacher training. And what I haven’t noticed until last year, even though some people have told me before that I shouldn’t plan so much, was how I am reacting when things don’t work out according to my plans. I had the surprise to find out that I actually don’t like to do things outside my routine, I don’t like to take detours and if plans are slowed down by events that I can’t control, I have a tendency of reacting like a spoiled 3 year old: I want it and I want it NOW!!!!
Last year has thought me that having trust that things will work out even when I have absolutely no idea how, it’s the best thing you can do for your sense of inner peace. Setting intentions instead of goals and releasing them in the Universe, knowing that if it is the best for me, it will happen, has done wonders for me in the last 6 months.
The difference between having an intention and having a goal (or plan) is that with intentions, you are releasing the attachment to the outcome. With plans, you know how things will work out and you know exactly by when they will happen. But if things don’t go according to your plan, you get upset and unhappy because you can’t see clearly if your goals will work out.
To finish my post for today, I will say that I have never been so calm in my life like I am now, because I trust that what ever is the best for me, will happen. The inner peace that comes with this acceptance is unbelievable and I wanted to share this with you guys!
What was you biggest lesson in the last year? Share it with us in the comments below! 🥰
Love and hugs, Andreea❤
Namastayzenyoga 